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Emotional Abuse in a relationship

Abuse can be emotional and physical. Emotional abuse does not leave a bruise on the body, but it is damaging. The effect is long-term for emotional abuse. It can take several years to heal.

abusive relationship

What is emotional abuse in a relationship?

Emotional abuse and the effect on the relationship is devastating, especially for the victim. An excellent loving and understanding connection between both partners is imperative.

In a healthy relationship, respect, trust, and consideration for the other person are involved; In a link where people experience abuse, they do not have these qualities. Instead, they included disrespect, mistreatment, jealousy, controlling behaviour, and physical violence.
When you feel walking on eggshells, receive an insult, and hurt, this may be emotional abuse.
Abusers like to make you feel worthless; They used different techniques to put your down and to keep you under their control. Emotional abuse is one of the hard forms of violence to recognize. It can be subtle, insidious and manipulative.

How to identify emotional abuse?

Any relationship is emotionally abusive when the pattern is consistent; they used offensive words and bullying behaviours, to put down your self-esteem and mental health. You start to doubt your perceptions and reality, and this is what they want. The goal is to keep you under their control.

To dominate, the abuser discredit, isolate, and silence the partner; You feel trap, scare and afraid to leave the relationship.
Accusations, verbal-abuse, name-calling, criticisms, gaslighting destroy the sense of who you are and the way you see yourself. You start to agree with your abuser and begin to criticize your self, as you feel you are not good enough for nobody. 

If you are looking to know if you are in an abusive relationship, think about how you interact with your partner and the way they make you feel. If you experience the feeling of hurt, confuse, frustrate, misunderstand, depresse, anxious, worthless and having insomnia. You are in an emotionally abusive relationship.

What are the signs of emotional abuse?

If your partner does only a few things, you are in an abusive relationship, do not minimize their behaviour. Healthy relation is about respect and love.
Those are just some examples :

– Expect you to put everything aside to meet their needs
– Ask you to spend all of your time together
– The relationship is more giving without receiving
– Asking that you name dates and times when discussing things that upset you
– Not accepting your feelings by telling you how you should feel or necessary how you make them feel.
– Telling you, you are too sensitive, emotional, and crazy
– You exaggerate and do not understand the subject
– Your partner started arguments about everything
– Contradictory or confusing statement
– Mood change drastically
– Make you feel guilty
– Humiliate you
– Deny and lie to you
– Blame you for their behaviour and mistake
– Make a joke at your expense
– Use sarcasm
– Use jealousy and envy
– Control your finance and so on

How to deal with emotional abuse?

The first step is to recognize that it is happening in your relationships. Be honest with your emotions and your experience to take the control back of your life. Put yourself as a priority, physically and mentally and take care of your needs.

Set up your boundaries and do not allow your partner to cross them. If they start to yell, insult you or other things, leave the room.
Please do not blame yourself; this is nothing to do with you but with your partner and their low self-esteem. You cannot “fix” them, and this is not your job as a spouse.

Have a good support network in place to help, support, and listen to you. They can help to show you a different perspective of your life and your possibilities.
If your partner does not want to change his behaviour, end the relationship to stop the abuse.

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